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Hi – I’m Crystal Ponti!
I’m a time-starved mother suffering from what I believe to be MUDD or Motherhood Unintentional Distraction Disorder. My mind is everywhere! But that’s okay. There’s never a dull moment around these parts! Welcome to my world!
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NICK: Why is the head of Luca’s penis blue?
ME: Ummmm, because it is.
NICK: Is there something wrong with it?
ME: No. Baby boy pee pees often look like this. Read more
I’m pretty sure that at some point someone explained to me why Cupid was associated with Valentine’s Day. Then I had children and my mind became a floating melon. I can’t remember which name goes with which kid. And I sure as hell have no flipping clue why a naked troll armed with a crossbow is love’s representative. So I did what any upright mammal with two legs would do…I Googled to find the answer. Here’s what I learned: Read more
Are a million thoughts all jumbled together.
Is a to-do list a mile long.
Is a teenager still wearing a Bon-Jovi t-shirt and rockin’ blue eye shadow. Read more
With the recent birth of our son Luca, I’ve been thrown back into the ring of motherhood full force. It’s one thing mothering and caring for older children, but having two under the age of two is taking it to another level…level of total chaos, that is. It’s been 20 years since I had more than one under the age of two. Now I remember why chocolate became my go-to meal and my hair constantly resembled Don King’s. There’s no time for breathing let alone jumping in the shower to clean the ungodly scent of spitup, poop, and smashed food from your body. I’m a walking disaster and, I’ll admit, I have been feeling sorry for myself. I want to look like Angelina Jolie…just for a minute! I want to sleep for 20 hours and feel like I can take on the world! I just want two seconds to breathe… Read more
About a month ago, I wrote a post entitled Where does time go when you’re a mom?, which received a lot of commentary and input from moms around the globe. I had mentioned that an infographic might be necessary to get a real grasp on how our time is actually spent. Well, here it is and, holy bat balls, are we busy! Let me know how this differs from what your day looks like. I’d love to hear from you! Read more
I’m at that age when I thought I’d have my shit together by the age I am now.
This should be tattooed across my forehead. It’s not that I don’t have my shit together; it’s more that I’ve had a constant series of setbacks. Failed relationships. Desperate divorce settlements. Home ownership security to you-never-know rental agreements. Most recently a job opportunity fell through after I had already gieven up the security of another job. Setback after lousy setback. I mean, really. What’s the way to Golden Pond? Read more