I recently had the pleasure of reading humorist Anne Bardsley’s new book, How I Earned My Wrinkles. And I swear … this might be the first book that actually causes laugh lines. I could not stop giggling! The book is a hilarious collection of stories that Anne groomed from decades of being a mom, wife, and woman of this crazy world. From growing up in a reserved, yet quirky family to welcoming her own grandchild, you’re invited to follow along as Anne relives some of her most memorable (and comedy-infused) moments.
My favorite stories include The Punk on the Beach, which brings to life the time Anne and gang punked her husband, a Eucharistic minister, into thinking he’d broken some sacred rule when judging an impromptu swimsuit competition; Professionalism where one very pregnant Anne finds herself completely toppled over and stuck on a client’s couch; and Mr. Bojangles the story of an old man and his extraordinary dog that teach Anne and friends a valuable life lesson.
Here’s an excerpt:
I have been blessed by the Wrinkle Fairy.
She perches on my right shoulder. I caught her waving her sparkly wrinkle wand at me last week. She was laughing as she anointed me. I frowned at her and tried to swat her away.
It’s not easy avoiding the Wrinkle Fairy when you are married to the Master Wrinkle Maker … my husband, Scott.
I noticed that the Wrinkle Fairy is more active when he is in the room. I follow him around, closing cabinet doors and drawers, putting things back in the fridge, and searching for his ever-lost keys.
He also swears that he tells me important facts, but I never remember hearing them come from his mouth. For instance, he claims that he told me, “Don’t use the American Express card. The balance is getting too high.”
That afternoon, I went out and charged $214 on—you guessed it—American Express. I have no recollection of his conversation about not using that card. I think he is messing with my head.
This makes me wrinkle up while I try to backtrack in my menopausal mind. I can barely remember him, let alone an imaginary conversation. The Wrinkle Fairy notices my expressions, so she does a little twirl and BAM! She shakes her wand at me.