Keep Your Parenting Advice To Yourself (please and thanks)

advice

I love how even at my age I am continually lectured about how I should and shouldn’t raise my daughter (and other kids – including the new one). How could I possibly have let her drink from a sippy cup at only 7-months-old? Why we would ever consider co-sleeping with her? After all, this screws with a child’s independence, right? You know, I like to think of myself as a good mother. I have raised three wonderful boys. They have never been in serious trouble or made devastating choices. They are not racist or judgmental. They are good, well-adjusted kids. I raised them and helped shape who they are today. And I did a damn good job.

I plan on raising my daughter and infant son to even higher standards. There is no way I would ever fail them–hell would have to freeze over first. They are my babies. But I seriously wish people would back the >>insert curse word<< off. I don’t make it a practice to tell you how to raise your kid, please have the same respect.

I’m all for sharing helpful advice, recommendations and tips on parenting. There is, however, a right and wrong way to go about it. The right way is just throwing some ideas out there in a positive, “this worked for us” kind-of-way. Or giving friendly advice when asked for your two cents. The wrong way is blatantly pointing out another’s parenting style or technique and criticizing it openly. Do.Not.Do.This. Not only is it poor etiquette, it’s wrong. I’m going to raise my kids how I want to raise my kids. If I ask for your help or advice directly, there’s the open door. If you want to casually toss some suggestions into the wind, go for it. Want to be mini-van driving, stroller pushing jackass that is the President of all Things Parenting? Don’t do it!

Judging, questioning or criticizing the way another approaches parenting is a lot different than having a difference of opinion over politics or religion. Parenting is sacred. We all do it a little differently, what works for one may not work for another. But have faith. Most parents are well-intentioned and try to do right by their child. Unless that child appears to be in emotional or physical distress, or is being harmed in any other way, chances are the parent is just trying to be a good parent. Share your thoughts and give advice when asked. The rest of the time, unless you’re able to do it in a very low-key, non-cynical way, keep it zipped. The last thing you want to do is catch a mom in a “moment.” Gawd knows you better have full body armor on, earplugs in and a fast car nearby if you’re going to shove your parenting advice down my throat during one of those “moments.” Run, if you know what’s best for you!

Posted on by Crystal in Motherhood

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